Lakeshore Bus Changes Name

Residents suspicious change is only to confuse them

"Same route, new name!" is what a new sign posted on Lake Shore bus stops said today. Town Lake's beloved and only bus route will now be called East Lake Campus Shore (ELCS.)

Town Lake Metro spokesman Gus Driverson spoke in a press conference today about the change.

"There's no reason for it," Driverson said chuckling good-naturedly. "We just don't have a lot to do at the office and we want to confuse the f**k out of people."

Many residents feel confused, not knowing whether to ride the ELSC bus or to wait for a LS bus. On top of this, the bus drivers change the name frequently, often to insulting names or discouragements to board the bus.

"Not only does our bus name change all the time, but our bus drivers are crazier than a homeless man in a sack," sophomore Ben Neals said.

Though the bus situation seems grim, Driverson reminded Town Lake residents that they really don't have any other choice.

"What are you gonna do, ride the real bus? I don't think so."